1. Be the right person.
- We’re told to make a list of what we’re looking for in a spouse. You don’t know what you’re looking for. The list becomes everything you like. You’re saying, “I’m awesome. If we could find another of me, we’d be double awesome.”
- Single guys, you don’t know what you need. Single guys think about a good time and not about a good legacy.
- You don’t have a list for you. What does your list say about who you should be for your spouse someday?
- Make a list of how you need to grow, what you need to change, what you need to learn so that you can find a good spouse.
2. Marry the right person
- First, once you’re married … that’s the right person.
- Secondly, the right person should be someone who agrees with you.
- Those who are both Bible-believing Christians, are in theological agreement, pray regularly and attend church together have the highest rate of marital satisfaction, the lowest divorce rate, and have the most sex.
3. In the right way.
- 1 Timothy 5:1-2, young men should treat young women like sisters.
- We don’t have this category in our culture. We have friends with benefits, live-in roommate, co-habitator.
- We don’t have a category for healthy male and female relationships. You only find that in the Bible.
- That allows a friendship to develop, and I think that friendship is the basis of marriage.
- Song of Solomon 5:16, he is my friend and my lover. Friends with benefits is a corruption of this Christian truth.
4. At the right time.
- If you’re in college and don’t have any money, not the right time.
- If you’re still getting over addiction, not the right time.
- If you have a career track that is nonadjustable for marriage, now is not the time.
- If he just cheated on you, it’s not time.
- If your family, friends, and church say no, it’s not time.
5. In the right community.
- What does your church and family say?
- The worst marriages are those that rip someone away from community.
- If other people are not involved, you’re in great danger.
- This is why in Song of Solomon, her friends keep speaking in.
6. For the right reasons
- Some of you have an idol of independence and avoid commitment. Others have an idol of dependance and have to always be in a relationship.
- Check your heart. Are you doing this for the right reasons?
- When you do get married, you get to have sex.
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